#11: People Who Wear Fake Glasses
Why the fuck do people feel the need to wear glasses when they don’t need them? Do you honestly think that you’re going to trick people into thinking that you look “cool” or “intelligent”? Well you don’t, because both of those things went out the window when you put on those frames with plastic lenses fuckers.
Perhaps I’m biased because I’ve had to wear glasses all of my goddamn life, and I can’t actually SEE without them. This gets to be a little frustrating when other people are faking it, and get to wear them without necessity. I mean, when they take off their adorably chunky hipster frames, they can still see the sign that says, “Danger: collapsed bridge ahead”, so that they can safely avoid it without careening into a never-ending abyss filled with fire, heretic forks, judas chairs, and other dodgy medieval-looking torture devices; or am I describing hell, I don’t know, I get them mixed up sometimes. Either way, landing crotch down on anything spiky is never favorable.
But, my point is, despite this round-about way of saying it, I can’t see without these blasted glasses! So I don’t understand why people find it enjoyable to wear them when they have no practical fucking use; isn’t that fair?
I don’t know when being legally blind went into fashion, but it should stop immediately.