1000 Things We Hate #43: People Who Sing Along with the TV

9 04 2010

If I was your mother, I would smack you across the face with that newspaper as soon as a single note exited your mouth.

Now, I already hate musicals.  I don’t like them in theater, I don’t like musical movies, and I don’t like them on TV (I’m looking at you Glee).  I hate these things.  I will probably write about them some point in the future.

But, what I hate even more than that is the fuckers who sing along with the television especially to musical films.

It’s bitchy and annoying enough to watch American Idol and have your family members or friends strive to sing along or say “I could do better” because there are millions who are doing and saying those same exact fucking things across the nation.  Way to be original, urethra-face.

However, I hate most when people sing along to their favorite musical films.  Two specifically: Rent and Moulin Rouge.

Not only is it creepy to have the person next to you sing along to something about AIDS, it’s just downright fucking annoying.

Like I’ve mentioned, I’m already predisposed to not like a musical film.  So, if I’m finally convinced to watch it and I give in, don’t you fucking dare start singing along.  Let me enjoy the film as a film and not as a spectator sport.

Your voice is not so good that I want to hear it even outside of this film.  Your voice is in fact awful.  Stop showing off because there’s nothing to show off: only a lot of things to be embarrassed about.

Sure, this may be spawned by right now one of my housemates singing along at the moment.  That’s fucking frustrating.  That’s getting me down.  Quite frankly, I want to open up the DVD player and take a chunk out of the disc with my teeth.

This will happen to you, and bone fragments will be shoved down your throat as you inhale and they’ll shred your lungs and vocal chords, fuckers.

So, shut the fuck up.  Stay quiet.  Blink really hard if you feel the urge because if you let it out, that may be the last time you ever see anything.


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