1000 Things We Hate #48: Waking up to a Sore Throat

10 04 2010
Motherfucker.

Your little eyes squint open.  You take a deep breath in… and realize that your fucking throat is on fire.

What the fuck?  How the shit did this happen?

You haven’t been sick at all for the last 8 months, and you definitely don’t feel like you’re going to be sick.  In fact, you feel perfectly fine.  So, why the hell did your body punish you with a sore throat?

Sure, sure, it was probably because you slept with your mouth gaping wide open… that could be it.  But, that is no excuse for the pain you feel right now.  And, that’s really just too easy of a target.

So, you go into the shower thinking that with a little bit of time and hacking up 8 oz. of phlegm, you may start be feeling better.

Fuck that.

Your body is not about to let happen.

Nope, you’re stuck with this motherfucker for at least the next 10 hours, if not day. 

Solution?  Taking a fucking egg beater down your throat and scraping off the upset parts of your throat… perfectly reasonable.


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10 04 2010
Herbal Sleep Aid

[…] 1000 Things We Hate #48: Waking up to a Sore Throat « MechanisticMoth […]

28 09 2011
1000 Things We Hate #187: Class Cougher « MechanisticMoth

[…] Waking up to a Sore Throat […]

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