1000 Things We Hate #118: 2012 Hooplah

24 11 2010


So, in all fairness to my co-posters, it’s very unlikely that we’ll reach to 1000 Things We Hate until after 2012.  Hell, 2011 is just around the corner and this blog has been running for only a little over a year and a half.  I mean, 118 posts in a year and a half on things we hate is pretty impressive.  That’s nearly a new post every 2-3 days.  So, if the whole “End of the World as We Know It” thing really does happen… then, well, you’re looking at an unfinished column.  Damn.

But really, let’s just take this in for a bit: the Mayan Calendar and apparently a few other things END in 2012.  Sure, the Mayans were apparently an advanced civilization, but they didn’t outsmart European Disease or guns… they did like the horse-creatures brought over, though.  So, I’m basically questioning the trust-worthiness of an advanced culture that was eventually squashed by Western tyranny.  Hmmmmm.

Now, I’m not very well-rehearsed in 2012 lore, but I believe that at least gives me an outsider perspective.  Sure, I know that there has to be some reason involving charts or numbers or cycles of the moon to explain why 2012 – such an odd number – is foretelling the ending of the world.  But, come on, 2012… is that the best you can do?  Why not 2222 or 2020 or something that is much more visually appealing than “2012”.

Let me remind you of something before we get into more of the thick of it: Y2K.

Remember when everyone was like “Oh SHIT, let’s stock up on supplies!”  They went out and bought 20lbs bags of rice and cooking stoves maybe even 10 jugs of water.  WHAT THE FUCK PEOPLE?  WHAT THE FUCK?

Y2K made everyone look like fools.  I’m certain that 2012 will as well…  I mean, seriously, how many fucking History Channel specials does there have to be?  Seriously, the History Channel used David Icke as an interviewee one time.  They just lost all sorts of credibility there.

I suppose the controversy all boils down to… well, you know what… there was just a really fucking bad movie with cheesy special effects about it.  That basically says it all.

The Terror! THE TERROR!




2 responses

24 11 2010

What I was able to glean from the skimmed research of other people on the subject:
Mayan calendar: two schools of thought on this one; it means nothing, it means everything. Unlike the Gregorian calendar, which is cyclical, the mesoamerican calendar is linear, and divided up into various measures to mark the passing of time. December 21st or 23rd 2012 marked the end of this calendar, and most Mayan culture experts think that its merely where they chose to stop, as it is at the end of a significant cycle of 20 of their “long count” units, as in that they decided to put off equating until they could get accurate astronomical measurements later on.
On the other side of that coin, some theorists point out that the end of this “long count” cycle WAS significant, as it marked the end of the “fourth world.” they point out that the Mayans believed in different measures of time marked as worlds, in which their deities messed around with the earth, and that the current world, the fourth world, was the age of mankind. they speculate that at the end of this period, the gods will shake the cosmic etch-a-sketch, and do whatever it is that they want to do next; the age of the squids, or something.
That being said, neither reason really gives anyone reason to be especially concerned. And if we are all wrong, and the ancient Mayan gods really DO rewrite the world to their liking in 2012, then I will be VERY surprised.

13 01 2012
1000 Things We Hate #218: Friday the 13th « 1000 Things We Hate

[…] more posts on fear, check out: 2012 Hoopla and […]

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