Goldfish

25 10 2011

This may be somewhat related to a future post (cleaning fishtanks), but I just wanted to point out how strange goldfish are.

They’re orange and malformed with hints of white and bulbousness.  They seem to constantly be pooping at any moment.

I remember thinking about how easy it would be to swallow one (I have seen many people do so), but I was always taken aback by a squirming thing traveling down my gullet to the infinity that is my body.  Plus, pooping out fish bones would be weird.

Pokémon naturally has a goldfish Pokémon named Goldeen with an evolution being Seaking.

*goldeen*goldeeeeen*

At least Pokémon tries to spice up the droll little thing by adding a spike onto its head.

Anyway, we all know the real winners of the cute-fish-that-we-have-and-are-relatively-okay-with-dying-within-the-next-12-months, the Beta fish!

Vastly superior, the Beta Fish makes all other fish its slaves.  This could be possibly because the males or so gosh darn aggressive.  Strange that these bright fish are freshwater.  However, they reached this by selective breeding.  So, oh well.  They’re only semi-natural like the pugly or labradoodle.

In the end, those fish are going to die and die soon.  So, why go through all of the trouble.  Or, at least go through the trouble by spicing up your fish repertoire by getting something exotic that costs more than $5.


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25 10 2011
1000 Things We Hate #194: Cleaning Fish Tanks « 1000 Things We Hate

[…] hands would be covered and I would die on the inside.  JUST FOR SOME STUPID GOLDFISH.  They’re not even that interesting looking.  I plotted their death.  I still plot it.  […]

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