Hay, I’m about the wonderful land of hix. We do crazyyy things to cars. LIKE PUTTING BULL HORNS ON THEM!
Alright, it has proven that people are under the assumption that they are wild mofos if they put horns on their cars. In the picture above, you are presented with a stylish, metal set of horns. Well, where I come from, THEY USE REAL BULL HORNS. Or, better yet, real motherfuckin’ skulls! It’s scary seeing a large truck in your rear view mirror with the skull of something once living brazened on the front.
Seriously, it screams “Don’t fuck with that dude!” But, at the same time, it screams “YOU ARE A FUCKING DOUCHE, FUCKHEAD!”
The worst part is that these are the people that probably drive around with guns in their cars or tailgate OR EAT BABY LIZARDS. Overall, it’s obvious they are compensating for something… probably their small feet (OH NO! I HAVE SMALL FEET! Where’s my hood ornament!?). I just don’t see the point. Unless you’re a hunter celebrating your kill. But, alas, hunting’s weird. I like to eat all of my animals from their cages (just kidding PETA!).
What makes this hate even more disgusting (based upon my lack of holiday cheer) is when people put Wreaths on the front of their cars.
Okay, this aspect of the hate has a couple of things going for it. One, I heavily dislike holidays. Two, I dislike things that relate to holidays. Three, are you seriously putting a fucking pansy-ass wreath on the front of your jolly raised truck? That’s like putting a cockring with faulty batteries on your dick. Seriously, what the fuck?
Putting things on the front of your car is just ridiculous. Stop it. STOP IT!
And, it’s always safe to take a gander at the MASTER LIST for all of your hateful needs.